Friday, February 1, 2008
I get to go to a meditation retreat tomorrow. The buddhist meditation group or sangha that my friend Val goes to is sponsoring the day-long retreat. All week I have been trying to decide whether to go or not. Back and forth back and forth. In addition to periods of sitting and walking meditation a videotaped talk with her teacher and a guided visualization called total relaxation are planned. I have a hearing loss and was concerned that I wouldn't be able to hear the talk or the visualization. Feeling really frustrated in the midst of a day set aside for calm didn't feel good. I realized that instead of guessing about whether I would be able to hear clearly I needed more information. Anyone with any challenge may need to check ahead to see if an event would work for them. Just as one person may need to ask," Is this event wheelchair accessible?," I needed to ask," Will this event work for me if have difficulty hearing?" I called my friend Val who is one of the organizers and asked my questions. Although she couldn't tell me for sure if I would be able to hear or not, she could tell me that the talk and the visualization would have microphones and speakers. With this information I feel good about going and seeing if it works for me. It was a good teaching to recognize that what I want and need is o.k. and that it is alright to ask for help. Is there something that you want or need that you are holding back about expressing or a way that you need help that you aren't asking for?