Monday, June 22, 2009

Three centers 2

More about the three centers and relationships. Remember from last time there are three centers within each person: thinking, feeling and doing. Each person overuses one , is supported in that overusing by the second and represses the third. As I said, I overuse feelings am supported in that overusing by thinking and repress doing. That means I sometimes overfocus on my feelings and thinking about my feelings and am challenged about getting things done. Since I wrote the last blog I have been doing up a storm. I watered my whole lawn last night and washed all of my hand washables. It really helps me to write about things I am challenged by. By bringing mindful compassionate attention to things I would like to shift in myself, the shift begins to happen. Sharing it with you jump starts that shift.
Gary and I went to my friend Linza's 60th birthday party on Saturday night.
Linza and her husband Erick are in the Wisdom course, a personal growth course, all weekend. She asked us to come to the guest community part since that's where they were going to be on her actual birthday. As part of the night's activities we got into a circle and shared with the other people what we liked about each of them. Some of the people who were all Linza's friends, I had met before briefly, some not. In the past in a similar social situation with people I barely knew, I would have sat in the circle being afraid and thinking about my fear." What if I don't know what to say and can't think of anything to say? What if what I say comes out stupid? yada yada yada" I would spend the entire time worrying. When it came to me I would be breathing shallowly and not thinking clearly. What I said to the person may have been fine but I would rehash it over and over and judge myself. By the time I was the recipient of the compliments I would be so beaten down by my own invalidating that I wouldn't be able to take the complements in and would immediately forget them. Thinking about my feelings would have interfered with the doing of being receptive to the appreciations. This time I was way more focused on the doing. I sat quietly and listened. It was amazing to me how much I could get out of a sharing exercise when I was listening to what was going on. I was able to make contact with each person and breathe and say what I wanted to say without very much planning.
I could show up much more clearly for myself and others. When it came to be my turn I felt relaxed and receptive, even a little excited. I took in what people shared and felt grateful. The whole experience was a very positive one. It also let me see the power of people sharing from the heart with each other even if they didn't know each other well. The depth of the level of energy that got created was palpable. I appreciated the opportunity to practice what I am teaching.
Is there someone in your life or a situation, you could practice balancing your three centers with? What would that look like?

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