Friday, April 25, 2008

Rushing and the Muse

I feel so rushed. It seems there is so much to do. When I am rushing it is hard to be mindful of my choices. Taking this time to write seems really challenging because so many other things are calling for my attention. I know, however, that I will feel better after I write this. Partly I will feel better because focusing on the creative process brings me into the present where there is no rush. If I draw my circle around myself (I just did)
and concentrate on writing this all of my thoughts about rushing to the next thing have no room. When I focus on my fingers on the keys typing this and interrrupt my judgemental thoughts I can be in the flow. When I let myself be distracted by my thoughts of the future, the flow of my typing leaves and I start to make mistakes. It makes sense that indulging the extraneous thoughts that pull me away from my center, creates an obstacle to being in the creative process of writing this blog. The energy of rushing myself to finish
writing this makes writing so much more difficult. Rushing actually slows me down. I kindof of knew that that was true because when I am rushing I trip over things and break things and forget things and miss exits on the highway. The energy of urgency makes life less enjoyable because I am not experiencing what I am doing when I am doing it. It is cool to be in the actual experience of how rushing makes me tense and anxious and actually less productive and efficient. I breathe slow deep breaths and bring myself back from the sense of urgency. Rushing breath is short and choppy and shallow. As I breathe I feel my body relaxing. I can be here and let the writing flow out of me rather than forcing myself to think of something to write about and then censoring it as being stupid.
I feel the joy of being here writing, moving through my body. I write because writing teaches me to be in the experience of writing. Being is so healing in a world of Doing. I am grateful to my creative muse for always being there patiently waiting in the wings for me to take the time to move out of my own way and let her send the words from my mind through my hands. Thank you for the opportunity to write this blog. Thank you for reading this blog. What happens when you move out of the sense of urgency? What's it like to connect with your muse? Your muse may be waiting for you to take the time to slow down, breathe deeply, ask to connect with her and listen.

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