Letting go of being right

In his teaching for the week from his book, Dancing with Life, Phillip Moffit suggests three practices of renunciation that concern our internal dialogue. The one I chose was letting go of being right. I took that intention with me on my personal retreat. I had a wonderful time being in a beautiful natural setting doing whatever I wanted to for three days. At home I rarely let myself read novels. When I do I have lots of trouble putting them down and do not want to do anything else. Growing up, I escaped from my life reading fiction. I was a voracious reader. I often stayed up late reading by the nightlight in the hallway with my legs up a chair while my family slept. One of the things I have always held onto being right about is what is worthwhile to do with my time and what is not. Even though I do read novels sometimes I usually feel guilty about the time I take to read a whole novel in a few days. On my trip I decided to give myself permission to read as much as I wanted to without guilt. I spent many many hours reading either holed up in my room or relaxing on the back porch with a breathtaking view to join me. One day I read for 6 hours. It was bliss. There is something so healing about completely losing myself in the world of a book. One book was a fantasy murder mystery about yiddish policemen. It was different than anything I have ever read. I had to let go of being right about the kinds of books I enjoy reading. The story and the characters were so well developed it allowed me to let go and enjoy myself. The other book I read was a delicious metaphysical fantasy about a soul group finding each other and creating a community. They could tell who their link or partner was by the similarity of their sound vibrations. The vibrant adventures of the elves in the story drew me into their community as if I were part of it. Near the end of my trip I soaked in the hotsprings with two people who I had pre-judged wouldn't be willing to really talk about anything I was interested in. We had a lively and depthful conversation about relationships. I came away feeling hopeful and inspired and glad that I let go of being right and didn't cancel going up to soak with them. There was another guy in the hotsprings ranting about the myth of global warming. I listened politely and then let go of being right about everyone disserving to be heard kindly. I told him I couldn't hear him very well and that I didn't really want to. I got out of the pool and was relieved to have let go of being right enough to set a clear boundary. Later I heard he was making disparaging remarks about Jews. I was so glad I had stopped before it got to that. It was also fun to let go of some of my rigidity about what I ate and when. Sometimes I had nuts and seeds and called it a meal. Sometimes I ate past my usual stopping time of 9pm. Sometimes I ate standing up. Letting go of being right sure lessens guilt. If there is no right way to do something, what is there to feel guilty about? Shoulda woulda coulda is all about being right. Where are you about being right? How does it manifest in your daily life in your relationship with yourself and with others? It has definitely been worth exploring. Next time I am going to apply letting go of being right to judgement and blame versus discernment. I'll keep you posted.